Living with Asperger syndrome

Talk

When a person has conversed with you at length (say at a dinner party) they’ll either:

1. Take offence.
2. Flee the room in tears.
3. Tell others it was the best conversation they’ve ever had.

This is because you:

1. Have trouble lying.
2. Don’t bother with small talk.
3. Take a genuine interest in what the person is saying.
4. Ask insightful, meaningful and penetrating questions .

Social events, therefore, are something of a minefield, depending on the disposition of the people you speak with.

It’s much easier to avoid socialising altogether, though this will eventually leave you feeling like an isolated failure.

A good counsellor can teach you to converse like a normal person.

The goal is to express moderate interest in safe topics like cars, sport, weather, celebrities, home loans and infants.

Dead boring, but that’s what normal people deal with every day.

Pity them.